Take a Loving Look How we see our partners often depends more on how we are than how they are. Husbands and wives are not audience,but participant observers in each other's lives. "Before we were married,my husband was a caring,energetic man,"a wife once told me." He couldn't seem to keep his hands off me. Since we've been married,he's become a couch potato and watches ball games more than he watches me. He's gone from stud to spud." "Very funny,"answered the husband. "But have you looked at yourself lately? When we got married,you were beautiful. Now you wear that old robe. If I've gone from stud to spud,then you've gone from doll to drudge."